I desire to be the type of leader that I will follow without question into battle. That requires trust, confidence, and the awareness that my leader will do or has done anything he has asked of me. There are too many leaders that have that “do as I say and not as I do” syndrome.

-You need to read your Bible more… but I barely picked it up in my quiet time.
-You need to pray/worship/get into God’s Presence… but my knees haven’t hit the floor in a long time.
-You need to give more… but you need to ask less of me.

Jesus, Our Standard of Leadership, set a great example in regards to this principle:

-In regards to serving, He said, “For even the Son of Man did not come to be served but to serve others and give His life as a ransom for many.” (Mark 20:28)
And that’s exactly what He did.

-In regards to the cost of living for God, He said, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross…” (Luke 9:23)
And that’s exactly what He did.

-In regards to obedience even in discomfort or pain, He said, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.” (Luke 22:42)
And that’s exactly what He did.

A good leader leads people to do exactly what he/she has done or is willing to do.

“You cannot be a tour guide to a place you’ve never been to…”

As we continue to pray hard and work hard towards being good stewards of the work that Jesus put before us and planting Fervent Church in Hoboken, I’ve developed this paradox or two contradicting proverbs of mine.

“Things are never as hard as they seem.”

“Things are often harder than they seem.”

Similar to the famous contradicting verses in the Bible, “Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself.” [Pr 26:4] and “Answer a fool according to his folly, or he will be wise in his own eyes.” [Pr 26:5], it all depends on what God is doing in the moment.  There are times when I don’t need to fight fire with fire because I will just mirror the fool and join in on his/her foolishness.  Then there are times when I have the leverage to influence that person, and I need to not be passive but bring correction so that the fool will no longer remain a fool.

In the same way, “Things are never as hard as they seem.”  Sometimes, I’m overly logical and I count the cost to the point where all my faith is sucked out of me and I allow myself to think that this is too hard and it can’t be done.  However, by the Grace of God, I push through my logic and take a step of faith then realize that because of God, it wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be.  This can be applied to our evangelism especially.  At times, I look at a person’s strong personality and think that they will never give me the time or day to speak to them about Jesus.  Then, I do it anyway and more often than not, it ends with the person crying like a baby and realizing their need for a Savior.

AND THEN there’s the statement that, “Things are often harder than they seem.”  There are times when I use phrases like, “let’s just…” or “that’s easy…” due to pride or reliance on my gifts, talents, and abilities.  God then uses those situations as an opportunity to humble me and show me that I can do this with Him or without Him, but one is always better than the other.

So discern the moments and walk by faith and not by sight. (2 Cor. 5:7)

“Stay thirsty my friends.”

But, here it is: I don’t want a better life.

Through taking personal inventory in my life and helping others through counseling, I’ve found that when the goal is to have a better life, we sometimes get to a place where the ends justifies the means and we’ll do anything to make it “better”.

The Apostle Paul said (from prison btw):
Philippians 1:21 (NKJV) – For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain.

Death isn’t having a better life. It’s not having life at all. However, being in prison and being persecuted for living for Christ was more about Paul’s steadfast character and consistent worship towards his Savior than the condition of his circumstances. Real quick, I’ve noticed when our overall drive is to “have” a better life we’ll:

• Pacify a conflict quickly, rather than resolve it with time and effort
• Lie our way out of a situation, rather that working our way through a situation
• Throw money at a problem, rather that wisely investing in the solution
• Hoard everything and everyone, rather than living generous and selfless
• Quit and abandon the mission because it’s too hard, rather than perserving and seeing it through the tough times

No one ever promised that life would be easy, but it’s worth it. I want to “live” a better life, not just have (possess) a better life. I want to “be” better not have better. All of our possessions will fade away, so let’s set our minds on eternal things. It’s not that God doesn’t care about your circumstances, because He certainly does. However, God is more interested in developing your character than He is your comfort in the moment. The truth is that if you “live” a better life, you will eventually bear good fruit and have a better life anyway.

Manipulation can come in the form of:
-Adult temper tantrums: unnecessarily complaining to a manager of a store to get something free, using the “why don’t you love me” phrase when you don’t get your way with your spouse, making people feel sorry about you as you exaggerate your trials to them

-Lying or “fudging” with the truth: saying things in a certain way not to help someone in their thinking, but to change their thinking for personal gain, saying things so people can share in your bitterness (gossip), or saying the right thing with the wrong heart

-Rushing/delaying the process: making everything seem urgent, or taking short cuts so things come in your timing, skipping stages, procrastination, etc.

You feel you have to manipulate people when:
-You are hiding something: such as a weakness or a mistake(s)

-You are living more out of your selfishness and not your servant hood

-Your trust isn’t in God but yourself

I found that when manipulation is involved, it usually means God’s will isn’t…

John 15:5 “…for without Me you can do nothing.”

As Nathaniel and Phillip approached Jesus, the Son of God who knew man’s thoughts didn’t say anything about Nathaniel’s negative reaction. He decided to go a different route. Jesus proclaimed that Nathaniel was a true Israelite, in whom there was nothing false. Jesus then gave some more insight by telling Nathaniel where he was before Phillip called him. Nathaniel instantly became a believer.

Jesus gained Nathaniel’s respect and broke his familiarity, not by calling Him on his crap, but by seeing Nathaniel as he truly was and leading him to see greater things. I believe that’s the approach we should have in leadership when we are recruiting people to join us on this journey to be used by God. The eyes of leadership should see people as they are, and not who they are in a moment.

When there was no one to till and water the soil, God provided a mist to take care of it. When He doesn’t place it in someone’s responsibility, He’ll take care of it! But, we are responsible for what He does place before us. Now, I’m not saying that, “If you take care of what He placed before you, than He’ll take care of you.” What I am saying is that He takes care of us (period). He even takes care of us when He does put something in our care.

I heard a parent say recently, “well, I was inexperienced when I had the first kid and she came out alright, so the second kid will be the same way.” I was so conflicted because he was right to a certain extent…the kid was alright. When he first started this journey, he didn’t know much and God took care of it… BUT NOW, God has placed under his care some “experience” to go along with the second child. So…we need need to take care of what God has blessed us with. He needs to approach the second child with more wisdom because even if God will grace the second child to turn out alright, he should honor God this time around with what God gave him through the first experience. That’s why Jesus said, “For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.” (Luke 12:48)

So… When there’s no one to take care of it, God will. When there IS someone God has commissioned to take of it, God will take care of them WHILE they take care of their God-given assignment.

I think the second temptation is to build a team around “You.”  This is extremely difficult because as a leader you should have a dynamic personality, an approachable & likable nature, and the ability to gather people.  These qualities are extremely important!  There are too many people holding a position of leadership, without having any personality at all to lead people.  The other side of this is just as bad.  It’s wrong when you build your team solely on YOU and your personality.

In John 3, John the Baptist makes a great proclamation:
“²⁹ The bride [church] belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. ³⁰ He must become greater; I must become less.”

God developed leadership in His Church to direct people to Christ, and not to overshadow Christ.  Preeminence in the Church belongs to Him.  (Read a post on Fervent Church about Church Leadership)  If I can be vulnerable for a moment, this could be a huge issue of mine if I don’t keep it in front of me.  I work hard and I play hard, plus I love being with people.  I can have the tendency to gather people because of the fun work environment I create, and that can allow us to forget that this isn’t about me!  “He must become greater; I must become less.”  Now there are things I am doing to hold me accountable with this issue, but I’ll share that later.

Here are some quick issues with building the team around “You”:

-Obviously there is a huge issue of ego.  It’s hard to maintain a servant’s heart, when you have to be the one who is being served.  We’re called to be Christ-like, and Jesus came to serve not to be served (Matthew 20:28)

-The health of the team/Body of Christ should not be dependent on one part (other than Christ being the head).  It’s like asking, “what’s more important: the lungs, the heart, or the spine?”  There are all important and vital.  There’s room for only one head under the crown of the Kingdom, and that’s Jesus.

-The team/church shouldn’t stop functioning because they lost “You.”  In scripture, I don’t see the Church stopping because of the death or imprisonment of one.  I’ve watched people walk away from “their faith” because a leader has disappointed them (moral failing or burnout) or abandoned them.  I blame both the person who walked away because they built their faith on the wrong thing, and I blame the leader for creating that culture.  We have to get back to “The Lord being our Shepherd.”  Again, I am the pastor of this church, but He is the Head of The Church.

So, I plan to build the team/church on Jesus by exemplifying servant-leadership and empowering people to do the same, and not allow the hierarchy of this organization to ever trump the monarchy of the Kingdom of God.

The Temptation of Chemistry
At first, I wanted the chemistry of the team to be a major priority when approaching the launch of our church plant. I wanted a team that would still have a relationship with each other even after we’ve “clocked out.” Although I haven’t completely given up on that desire, I started realizing that there is an issue of semantics when it comes to this word. Some people see group chemistry in a way that everyone has most things in common. I don’t necessarily agree with that definition, but I can see the danger of seeing it that way. That approach doesn’t ensure harmony. The song isn’t as “pretty” as it could be when everyone is on melody. Even Jesus had harmony in His group… most of the disciples were fisherman, but He threw in a tax collector, a member of the zealot party, and a business man just to shake it up.

Relationship in team is so important, but here are a few things to remember:
-Unity is needed and important, but it is the vehicle of our purpose not our destination
-It’s difficult to create a sense of approachability when there is a perceived “mold” to your team (this becomes a growth-hurdle)
-It’s an obstacle to be “all things to all people” when you just have one flavor to offer
-This kind of culture doesn’t accept change well (“Change brings pain, but pain brings growth”)
-You will have a hard time being creative when everyone brings the same thing to the table
-The world is full of different types of people, so it’s good to have variety in your arsenal to reach out to them
-Unified in spirit and mission is better than having chemistry between personalities. Personalities tend to have attitudes, but the spirit and mission should stay pretty consistent.

More on this later…

I will be leaving my current position as an associate pastor and beginning a journey with my wife and 6 year old boy to plant a church. To be honest, this is scary and exciting all at the same time. There are a lot of “I don’t know”s… I don’t know how long it’s going to take, I don’t know how well people will receive it, I don’t know how God is going to provide…

Here’s what I do know:

-This is what God wants us to do now. I refuse to rush it, or slow it down. We’re determined to let Him determine the pace and direction, because it’s His Church not ours!

-I am running towards what God has put on my heart, and I am not running away from anything. God taught me this lesson very early in my life: “You will miss out on what/who God has called you to be if you are only focused on what you don’t want to be.” I’m not disgruntled nor upset with anyone. That’s a bad way to start anything. If you really know me, you are aware of how much I value honesty and integrity. I have nothing to prove, nothing to lose, and nothing to hide when I say any of this. Kelly and I sincerely and genuinely love the people that we have worked with and have served for the past 12 years and we will always be here for them.

-We are not asking anyone to follow us. I believe that God has called us to lead a church plant, not a church split. Since that is the objective, I urge you to complete the task that God has placed on YOUR life because I’m not interested in creating followers of Mike Rosado…I’m dedicated to making followers of Christ (period).

-I know the type of church God has wired me to lead. It’s heavily based on Biblical standards and guided by the Holy Spirit. It will be different because I am different. I refuse to be led by expectations that others have on me to be similar to what I came out of, or to be the complete opposite. No group, “side”, or denomination/movement can claim us. I will preach the Gospel, teach people to love God, make disciples of Jesus, and be empowered by the Holy Spirit to reach the lost. I’m going to keep it simple because that is already a huge task. No other expectations.

-We have no expectations on our family (our parents and siblings). I’m not expecting them to be a part of this work and I am not going to reject them either. We have simply asked for them to do what God has told them to do. They are fully aware that regardless of what church they attend, we are still family and they have our complete support and love. Our family is tight and that won’t change.

-This church will not be located anywhere near any of the current campuses that are operating. I desire to be an “overseer” that lives “above reproach” (1 Tim. 3), so the best thing I can do is show professional courtesy to those I have worked under. More importantly, I can honestly say that I do not feel peace to plant in that area. God has directed us to go somewhere else.

With all that being said, I want to end quoting the Apostle Paul~
“Only let your conduct be worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or am absent, I may hear of your affairs, that you stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel…” (Phil. 1:27)